EARBALLS: The number of people listening to a radio station or concert, or visiting an online music site (WordSpy.com)

(Photo: NPR.com)

It's been kind of heavy for the past couple of days, so let's take a look at something a little lighter. Like earballs, a word being introduced into our lexicon which is the aural equivalent of eyeballs. Eyeballs are the number of people who are watching something at any one time. Earballs,therefore, are the number of people listening to a concert or a radio program on the Internet at any one time.

I don't have the slightest idea how they begin to calculate such things. It has always amazed me that the media reports that 6.3 million people watched a speech the night before on television. How do they know? Nobody ever called my house to ask what I was watching at 9:00 the night before! If I were a conspiracy-obsessed person I might wonder if there was a tiny camera embedded in my television to view the people in my household and their television habits. I don't think so, and I sure hope not. I don't want someone I don't know seeing me drool when I fall asleep in front of the TV!

But somehow companies who are interested in such things have the capability to know the number of earballs listening to a concert. I suppose if you are interested in ratings, that's something people ought to know. It's probably a good marketing technique because nobody wants to be left out of the latest thing, and if 1.5 million people were listening to Madonna's concert last night on the Internet, I don't want to miss her latest songs. I'll pull it right up and (hopefully) purchase it legally.

There is something about a herd mentality in this kind of information. I can't be too critical of it, because the same kind of thing happens to me when I read a review of a new book. If it captures my interest, I want to rush right out to Borders and purchase it. The fact that it is still in hardback and will cost me the equivalent of a car payment is irrelevant. I envy people who wait for it to arrive at the local Public Library. Their patience is something I've never experienced.

I have to admit something right now. I've never listened to a concert on the Internet. I'm not sure I even know how to do it. I'm more inclined to stumble onto a concert on NPR and enjoy it while driving. I guess that means that I'm not an earball. But since every time I say the word it has the same reaction within me as the word hairball I'm not going to worry about it.